Chapter 2Self arises in converse and is a multidi custodysional solve that involves internalizing and p rig mo custodyting from pleasant eyehotsSelf is multidimensionalPhysical s puff uped head beliefs or so our appearing , size , and strengthcognitive ego beliefs somewhat our in classifyigence and aptitudeEmotional ego beliefs ab bug out our affect / musical noneingsSocial self-importance-assertion beliefs about how we ar with roughly an radical(prenominal)(prenominal)(a)s fri differencely subroutinesMoral self estimable and ghostlike beliefsSelf is a processour interpretation and initiation of self is ongoingOur definition and presentation of self varies e actuallyplace the worldners amicable classWe internalize and flake from neighborly perspectives.1 . Communication with enchant goingicular new(prenominal)s (family , peers , t to separately oneers ) is a major modulate on how we follow out ourselvesDirect definition explicitly reads us who we argon by labeling us or our behaviorReflected estimation is some separate s status of us we internalize evaluations1 . uppers communicate arrogantly about us and confer validating approximations of our worthy2 . Downers communicate negatively about us and our worth , putting down our dreams and goalsVultures ardor our self- conceit , finding and exploiting weak spotsIdentity scripts atomic number 18 rules for sprightliness and identityAttachment styles argon patterns of pargonnting that t from each one us who we ar and how to memory glide path affinitysSecure addition : Consistent attentive and loving responses address to positive self-worth and positive visits of othersFearful bail bond : negative , rejecting , abusive converse leads to a ensure of oneself as unlovable and a receive of others as reje ctingDismissive attachment : disinterested ,! rejecting , abusive style leads to positive view of self , and low regard for others and relationshipsAnxious /ambivalent attachment style : inconsistent treatment leads do a view of oneself as a source of problems , as unlovable , and as deserving of abuseThe generalized other (societal colloquy ) governs self-conceptOthers with internalized cultural prepargon pass views on to us in interactionThe generalized other conveys mess shape ups about race , gender , inner orientation , and amicable classWe use sociable comparison to see how our talents , abilities , and qualities measure up to othersMedia and institutions communicate cultural values , rules , subprograms , and attitudes of societyChapter 9Inter ad hominem run afoul exists when volume who calculate on each other register diametric views , interests , or goals and perceive their views as incompatibleIt is non fighting if we do not write out variety or if we do not press disagreement directly or indirect lyInter personal divergence only occurs in the center of people who affect each otherConflict involves tensions between goals , preferences , or ends that we ascertain deficiency to be reconciledWood identifies atomic number 23 grassroots principles of appointmentConflict is a inherent , standard , and needful in social relationshipsConflict doesn t invent a relationship unhealthy , precisely how competitiveness is handled lav be unhealthyOur attitudes regarding competitiveness are influenced by family scriptsConflict may be unconcealed or covertPassive aggressive behavior is a covert discrepancy of contravention that is ineffective and falseGames are as well ineffective , dishonest ship port of doing remainderSocial groups impact our divergence behaviors and nitty-grittysConflict so-and-so be bring offd hale and it can be man get along withd poorlyTo man era conflict well , we need to identify facial expressionsAfter identifying our feelings , w e need to distil them well (e .g , use I- wordingCo! nflict can be strong for indivi multiples and relationshipsResearch interprets no link between nerve of arguments and marital happinessInstead , having proportion eithery to a greater extent positive interactions than negative ones is the signalize to happinessThere are terce orientations to conflict , any of which can be withdraw to nearly relationship and stakesThe lose-lose orientation assumes that conflict results in losses for everyone and is , therefore , unhealthy and destructiveThe win-lose orientation assumes that one person wins at the expense of another(prenominal)(prenominal)The win-win orientation assumes that there are panaches to split differences so that everyone gainsThere are four responses to conflict that suppose our canonic orientations (lose-lose , etcThe exit response involves physic anyy or psychologically withdrawingThe disuse response denies or minimizes problems , anger , tension ,or other matters that could lead to overt conflictThe loyalt y response involves staying committed patronage differencesLoyalty is passive and tends to be constructive in the short magic spellLoyalty is associated with lose-loseThe role response addresses conflict directly and attempts to resolve itVoice is active and constructiveVoice is associated with win- winSpecific kinds of confabulation can foster or impede effective conflictUnproductive conflict piffle patterns recoil a preoccupation with self and a disregard for the otherIn the previous(predicate) stages of a conflict , unproductive communion is characterized by a failure to patronage the other , cross- utilise way off , and mindreadingAs conflict continues , unproductive communication is characterized by kitchensinking and maverick removalIn the later stages of conflict , unproductive communication is characterized by counterproposals , self-summarizing , and prodigal metacommunicationConstructive conflict communication patterns name positive humors that increas e the misfortune of resolving conflicts without harm! ing relationshipsIn the early stages of conflict , constructive communication is characterized by allow for audition , hitch , and a lack of mindreadingAs conflict continues , constructive communication is marked by agenda grammatical construction , bracketing , infrequent interruption , perception checking , and the assertion of our won of necessity and feelingsIn the later stages of conflict , constructive communication is characterized by dual perspective and contractingIn to urinate constructive conflict , Wood suggests ogdoad communication readinesssFocus on relationship , not just electrical capacity meaningsCommunicate substantiativelyListen awa imprecateUse I- lyric to take indebtedness for your feelings , thought , and issuesCheck perception via paraphrasingAcknowledge points of agreementConsider each person s face vitiate having others feel defeated stupefied or embarrassedImagine and respond to the futureWood offers five dollar bill general closing curta in thoughtsRemember the connection between conflict and the larger wholeTime conflict effectivelyAim for win-winHonor yourself , the other , and your relationshipShow graceChapter 8Interpersonal climate is the overall feeling or sensational liking between peopleInterpersonal communication influences interpersonal climateInterpersonal climate influences interpersonal communication delightful , trustworthy relationships are characterized by investment commitment , trust , and relief with comparative dialecticsInvestments are the irretrievable things ( e .g , time , sinew , thought feelings ) that we put into relationshipsCommitment is a decision to remain with a relationship , crimson during inevitable heavy(p) timesTrust involves believing in another s reli efficacy to do what is promised and look out for our welfare and relationshipSelf- revelation builds and reflects trustSelf- disclosure is scuppering personal entropy about ourselves that others are unlikely to nonp lus in other waysRelational dialectics are argue for! ces or tensions that are normal parts of relationshipsThere are 3 main relational dialecticsAutonomy / lodge is a relational dialectic foc employ wanting both(prenominal) independence and interdependenceNovelty / Predictability is a relational dialectic foc utilise on wanting both routine and new experiencesOpennes / Closedness is a relational dialectic focused on expressiveness and privacy2 . Partners serve with relational dialectics in our main waysa . Neutralization involves negotiating a balance in which each need is met to some extent , but neither is met richlyb . picking , the least effective response , gives antecedence to one dialectic need and neglects the otherc . Separation assigns dialectical take to certain spheres of interactiond . Reframing redefines needs as not in oppositionIII . Satisfying , close relationships (characterized by investment commitment , trust and trouble of dialectics ) reveal confirming interpersonal climates and confirming interpe rsonal climates lay down satisfying , close relationshipsConfirming is essentially valuingWe can confirm (or disconfirm ) at trine take aimsThe showtime level of confirmation is recognizing that another person existsThe second level of communication is acknowledging what another person feels , thinks , or saysThe third level of confirmation is endorsing another s feelings or thoughts as validSix types of communication resurrect weatherive / justificatory climates that consider us feel substantiate or disconfirmedEvaluative communication tends to give defensiveness descriptive communication tends to produce a validating climateCertainty (absolute , despotic language ) tends to produce defensiveness provisionalism (openness to other points of view ) tends to produce a encouraging climateStrategic communication (manipulation , misrepresentation ) tends to produce a defensive climate spontaneity (unpremeditated communication ) tends to produce a supportive climateControl (imposing view on others ) tends to produce defensive! ness problem orientation (finding a mutually acceptable firmness ) tends to produce a supportive climateNeutrality (detachment ) tends to produce defensiveness empathy tends to produce a supportive climateSuperiority tends to produce defensiveness equation tends to produce a supportive climateCHAPTER 7Emotions (i .e , feelings ) influences / are explicit in interpersonal communicationEmotions are expressed verbally and nonverballyTo communicate well ,we must develop skill in identifying and expressing in which situationsEmotional wisdom is also the ability to recognize which feelings are appropriate in which situationsEmotional intelligence is also the ability to communicate appropriate feelings effectivelyEmotions are processes named by physiology , perceptions , language , and social experienceThe organismic view of feeling drew care to physiological stimuliThe perceptual view of perception drew guardianship to perceptions shaping what external stimuli mean to usThe cogniti ve labeling view of feeling drew guardianship to language s influence on how we envision and respond to eventsThe interactive view of emotion proposes that social rules and understandings shape what we feel and how we do or do not express feelingsFraming rules define the unrestrained meaning of situationsFeeling rules tell us what we abide a right to feel or what we are pass concept to feel in a situationEmotion work is the effort to begin what we thing are appropriate feelings in particular situationsThere are four main reasons that we may not express our emotionsSocial expectations may caution feelings and expression of feelingsVulnerability to understanding , rejection , or sabotage my discourage expression of feelingsA intrust to cherish others may lead us to not express feelingsSocial and maestro roles may make some emotional expressions inappropriateThere are three ways in which we inefficaciously communicate emotionsWe express ourselves in generalities that do not make our feelings laterWe disown responsibility for ! our feelingsWe rely on counterfeit emotional languageChapter 6Listening is a major part of the communication processWe spend at least 50 of our open-eyed time listeningNot listening effectively actor we are communicating poorly about 1 /2 the timeListening is not the aforementioned(prenominal) as hearingHearing is physiological , occurring when sound waves hit our eardrumsListening is an active , complex process that consists of being mindful hearing , selecting and organizing development , interpreting communication , responding , and supposeingMindfulness is choosing to be fully present in the momentHearing is physically receiving messages , a prerequisite to listeningSelecting and organizing information involves the perception processes discussed in chapter 3Interpreting involves taking a dual perspective in to understand others perceptions of selves , others , and situationsResponding is communicating attention and interestRemembering is retaining what you fuck off heardC hapter 4Language is powerfulLanguage shapes meaning , identity , relationships and activitiesLanguage can create changeAll language symbolic and symbols are arbitrary , ambiguous , and abstractLanguage is arbitrary means that voice communication are not as such connected to what they representLanguage is ambiguous means that meanings of words are not clear-cut or fixedLanguage is abstract means that words are not thingsThere are four principles of verbal communicationLanguage and culture reflect each otherCultural values are produced by languageLanguage reflects cultural valuesMeanings of language are subjectiveLanguage use is rule-guidedWe partake in regulatory rules that specify when , how , where , and with whom to piffle about certain thingsWe share essential rules that tell us how to interpret communicationRules are often unconscious mind , but made evident when violatedPunctuation shapes meaningPunctuation refers to how we define the beginning and remainder of an interac tionDifferent punctuation mark leads to very antithe! tic meanings for what is happeningSymbolic activities impact our lives in five waysLanguage defines experiences , people , feelings , and thoughtsWe label people with languageWe label experiences in relationships with languageLanguage evaluatesLanguage is not neutralLanguage casts judgment and can be loaded or even hatefulLanguage organizes perceptionsLanguage allows hypothetic thoughtThinking hypothetically allows us to plan , dream , remember , right goals consider alternatives , and imagine possibilitiesClose relationships rely on moods of recent and presentHypothetical cerebration allows personal growthLanguage allows self- reflectionLanguage allows us to monitor our communicationLanguage allows us to manage our imageSpeech communities share norms about how to use discourse and what purpose it servesSpeech communities are not defined by geography , but by dual-lane understandings regarding communicationGender has received much research attention as a speech communityIntera ction in games teaches boys and girls different understandings of why , when , and how to talkCommunication rules in condition(p) in childhood are evident in braggart(a) communicationDifferences between men and women are a matter of degreeNot all women follow powder-puff rules of communication and not all men follow male rules of communicationSocialization into different gender speech communities accounts for misunderstandingChapter 3I . some(prenominal) factors influence our perception processA . Physiology influences our perceptionB . eld influences our perceptionC . Culture influences our perceptionD . Social roles influence our perceptionE . Cognitive abilities influence our perception1 . Cognitive complexity , the number of bipolar dimensions along which we can make judgments , shapes perception2 . Person- centeredness , our ability to understand others as unique beings with unique motives , feelings , and behaviors , influences our perceptions? 3 .
Our ability to empathize influences perceptionF . intelligence of ourselves coming out of interpersonal communication influences perceptionJerry Maguire examples?fe manlike support system /conflict with her sisLAUREL : All I m face . You puzzle t get up the luxury of falling for some drowningman . Be operable . like a shot . Which circus tent ( decoration h grizzlys up two tops DOROTHY : reach , you want to talk about practical ? Let s talk about my wonderful bread and butterDo you know what most other women my age are doing right now ? They arepartying in clubs , large(p) to act stupid , trying to pee a man , trying to keep a mannot me . I m trying to RAISE a man(She grabs the sexier top , and puts it onDOROTHY (continuing ) I ve got a 24 hour a daylight reminder of Roger , for the rest of mylife . I dupe had three lovers in four years , all boring , all achingly self- suitable , all friends of yours I might add , and all of them outpouring a distant second to a cranky bathroom . Look at me , bay wreath , look at me . I m the oldest 26 year old in the beingness ! How do I lookLAUREL : darlingDOROTHY : ThanksExample 2 (conflict with her sonDOROTHY ?Okay , have we at peace(p) over everything ? Back on Tuesday , rightJERRY : Yep . Have a real time at school , barb . Wish me luckDOROTHY / light beam therapy : Luck(Jerry nods and exits ?They decide as Jerry inches into the crowded airportObscuring their view of Jerry , enters another distich , who embrace and theirsmall daughter says sweet grievousbye . We linger on Dorothy and atomic number 75 as they both watch in tranquilize and think of the kind of goodbye they didn t get They look at each other , communicating volumes . They appeal back into trafficDialogue 1 showed that the main cha! racter needed her infant s support when she invited Jerry Maguire for the maiden time . By turning to her sister , Dorothy , was looking for some form of validation that what she was about to do is right . Dorothy was also utilize her sister , laurel wreath as a appear board for her own doubts and fearsThis communication relates to the course concept of communication climate Dorothy tells her sister how rugged it is to be a undivided flummox . This proves that Dorothy trusts medallion because she used self-disclosure Self-disclosure is revealing personal information about one s self that others are unlikely to discover on their own . Dorothy considers laurel as an important athlete because she can open up or talk about anything with her sister medallion is a fe blotto supporter of Dorothy . At the same time , they both had a conflict over their self-concepts . Conflict is intrinsic , normal , and inevitable in any interpersonal relationship . This conflict arose because their perceptions were different from each otherWhen Dorothy say , I am trying to fig out a man this shows that she acknowledges her social self . Social self is the belief we hold about our self when we are with others , in particular regarding our social roles .To resolve their conflict , Dorothy tells Laurel how she feels and what her frustrations are . She used I- language to clarify what she wanted to tell Laurel . This was a good opportunity to resolve the conflict By using the I-language , Dorothy takes responsibility for everything that she was saying instead of blaming everything on anyone elseLaurel s perception was different from Dorothy s . She thinks that Dorothy is acting irresponsibly and putting ray of light at a disadvantage because she invited a man over to her nursing home . But Dorothy knows she is not being do-nothing(prenominal) , so she told her sister that she knows her role as a ace mother . She then compares herself to other women in the same s ituationAlso throughout this dialogue , both women re! veal their emotions Emotions are the feelings that are expressed during interpersonal communication . Laurel is worried about her sister and tries to be protective fleck Dorothy struggles with one motherhood and her desire for more freedom from responsibilityIn the end , Dorothy told her sister , Look at me Laurel , Look at me .How do I look thusly Laurel responded , Good This shows the win-lose orientation of the conflict . When Laurel tell Good , it showed that she is broad up her argument and is letting Dorothy do whatever she wantsThis relates to the course concept of the self as an internalisation and action from social perspectives . Dorothy`s communication with her sister Laurel regarding the idea of inviting Jerry Maguire into her admit shows how our family members can be major influences on how we perceive ourselvesLaurel presents her reflected appraisal of Dorothy s decision downing it as irresponsible considering that Dorothy is raising a child . Laurel also downs the idea of Dorothy seeing Jerry Maguire , which she refers to him as a drowning man who her sister should not fall forIn the latter(prenominal) part of the pull out , Dorothy uses a social comparison to show the difference between her devotion to single motherhood and the devolve alongingly reckless abandonment of other single women . She elaborates by discussing how women her age get to have a smokestack more enjoyment than she does because she is limited by her responsibilities to her son . parenthesis from lack of social freedom , she also mentions that she does not have the security of a good , providing husband that other mothers haveDuring the expire part of the excerpt , after ranting about how hard life has been for her and how she looks old for her age , Dorothy seeks Laurel s confirmation on her physical appearance by asking how she looked . This showed Dorothy s social self and her need for approving which was fortunately satisfied by Laurel s answer , g ood which she subsequently affirmed by saying , tha! nksIn dialogue 2 , although there was no apparent conflict between Dorothy and light beam , it can be said that the conflict was definitely implied . It was a good example of what we learned in our course concept of non-verbal silenceBoth characters did not attempt to speak while they were watching a complete family say goodbye to each other . When they face each other again , enlighten and Dorothy spoke with their eye . This showed non-verbal silence at work . This was brought about by Dorothy s desire to protect Ray from the pain of acknowledging that he lacked a father figureIt also relates to the communication climate . Ray is still very young and he only has a gut feeling that there is something missing in his life . While Dorothy tries to do her best to ensure a good and happy life for her son , she in like manner , corporealizes that she does not have the ability to give everything that her son needs . This knowledge comes to Dorothy on her own musings and without Ray blaming her at all]^p DpYA opppppp?Oh zh z. For a teensy-weensy while it did feel like the three of them are a family until reality turn up otherwiseWhen they saw a happy friction match with a little daughter , Dorothy and Ray communicate volumes Dorothy , although not to blamed , was apologetic that she and Ray were not in the same family situation . Ray , on the other hand , seemed to be contemplating on why they were not like that other family . In their eyes , it could be seen that both were hoping that some day they can too become a normal familyAlthough it was not explicitly said , Dorothy clearly feels bad that her son does not have a father figure . Even though it was not her spot that her husband died , she feels obliged to find a way to fill that void in her son s life . Since she cannot seem to do so , she tended to put unnecessary pressure on herself which resulted in the fear that her son may grow up not knowing what it is like to be a real man . It is for this reason of trying to bring a male battlefront in Ray! s life that she hires a male nursemaid , Chad , to help her when she is not home ...If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website:
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